My Knight and Soulmate

I have always said that the relationship Goudy and I have is not the norm. And I have often told him that I wish I could clone him and pass him out to those who needed him, then the world would be such a better place. He has such a huge heart, would literally do anything for you and is loyal sometimes to a fault. He has always been my rock, my best friend and my soulmate. I could not imagine going through this journey with anyone else.

The moment we found out about the cancer, he has been my biggest cheerleader. He exudes positivity and refuses for any negativity to be spoken. He does, however, allow me to have my moments, expressing my fears and listens and allows me to be heard. He has rearranged his schedule to ensure that he is available for every appointment, MRIs, breast surgeon, plastic surgeon - all of it. He has been there every step of the way. I have always said that this is OUR journey as cancer not only affects the patient but the entire family. Yes, it is my body that is enduring the testing, the surgeries, the recovery. However, the emotional aspects are sometimes overlooked as this is a very draining journey - both physically and emotionally for EVERYONE. Every moment is consumed by making sure I am comfortable, medication schedule, caring of the drains and incisions, all of the housework (laundry which is done at least once a day if not twice depending on sheets/towels and my clothing, dishes, trash), feeding of farm animals. He literally is the chef, maid, butler and nurse every moment of every day.

I am so grateful for his support and help throughout this entire process. His job has been so very supportive as well; allowing him to rearrange his schedule to be at every appointment and make sure that my needs are met first and continue to ask how I am doing but also how he is doing.

He makes us breakfast every morning, our special concoction of coffee, my Juven (nutritional powder for wound healing - he makes two of these each night prior to bed for the next day), a protein source and my first set of meds. He has alarms for throughout the day for all the medications the doctor has prescribed and will text me if he is not here to make sure I have taken them. There are so many things that you are limited by because of this surgery, or surgeries rather. We had a bidet installed prior to surgery (best thing every by the way) because you are very limited in your reach after surgery. Need a bottle opened? You need someone to do it for you, need something down from the shelf? you need someone to do that for you as well. So many day to day ‘normal activities’ are now out of reach. The first week, he bathed me and washed my hair. He also has to dress me, help me put on my compression bra and binder that I have to wear for six weeks (this sometimes seems like an Olympic sport). We have a routine - 8 pm each evening he strips/cleans my drains, I take a shower (which now I can do by myself though he still keeps an eye on me) this takes about an hour. We then fix some tea, have a nice little slice of homemade banana bread (he is becoming quite the baker) and some hot tea and watch House Hunters International. I love routines, they make me feel safe. Though I typically fall asleep by the last show and then I get the last of my meds and off to bed we go. We have a Tempur-pedic bed which raises up and down - never knew how wonderful this really was until now. Does he complain that it is higher than normal - no, because that is not who he is at all.

This is just a glimpse in who he is and his side of this whole journey. He does not complain, he never seems put out and is always making sure my comfort comes first. When I say he is my everything, I mean it. He completes me in every way I never knew I needed.